by Merilee Dannemann
How much money is enough?
It’s a question most of us have asked ourselves.
Before you can really answer this question, however, first you have to add some words to the question itself, to clarify, “enough for what?”
Try the following wording, and see if it works for you: “How much money is enough to support me in living the life I’d like to live and feeling the way I’d like to feel about myself?” Does that make the question easier to answer?
The question is not at all about money in isolation, but about your goals, desires and dreams. If you don’t have enough money to fulfill your goals, desires and dreams, something is preventing you from having it.
The field of Neuro–Linguistic Programming, also known as NLP, teaches techniques for asking simple, powerful questions. Ask yourself, “If I don’t have enough money, what stops me?” That question might open up a floodgate of fears, doubts, emotions and conflicts.
Here are few of the fears that are common about money and wealth: “I don’t have enough money because I secretly fear I don’t deserve it.” “I don’t have enough money because I’m afraid of trying and failing. “I’m afraid of how it will change my personality.” “If I get wealthy, my friends won’t like me any more.” “Wealth is immoral because one person’s wealth makes someone else poor.” According to NLP experts Tim and Kris Hallbom, these and many other negative statements can be classified as “limiting beliefs.” If you have a limiting belief like the ones just mentioned, even at a deeply unconscious level, it might be holding you back from achieving the prosperity and success you dream of.
The Hallboms, an NLP team of trainers and innovators known worldwide, have developed groundbreaking programs to help people overcome limiting beliefs. Through years of study, practice and collaboration, they have developed a process called Belief Change, to help people uncover and then overcome limiting beliefs that affect their lives. Following this process, participants are able to delve into their own minds and discover the limiting beliefs, often held outside of consciousness, that hold them back from getting what they want in life. Then they are able to erase the limiting beliefs and replace them with new, empowering beliefs.
Recently the Hallboms have developed a training program that uses this Belief Change process specifically for issues of money and wealth. It’s called The WealthyMind™ Money Clinic.
Imagine for a moment that you’re going to wake up tomorrow thinking something like this: “I’d like more prosperity. If I have an abundance of money, I’ll use it wisely to benefit myself and others. I’m a good person and I deserve financial success. I can make it happen. I can keep learning as I go. If I try something and it doesn’t work, I can learn from from it and keep doing better. I’ll enjoy the challenges every day as I’m striving to reach my goal.”
A person with beliefs like that is unstoppable, don’t you agree? Could that person be you?
Imagine how your everyday life might change if you had beliefs as powerful as these.
Right away, you would start to notice things around you that support your belief. You may find yourself changing the language of your thoughts. Perhaps you might find that you’re no longer using the term, “I can’t. ” Instead, you’re saying, “I wonder whether I can,” and then that phrase evolves again into, “I wonder HOW I can.”
Because you would believe that you can achieve your goal—even if you don’t know how—you might start paying attention to information in the world around you that supports your intention. You might find yourself listening with new interest to people you didn’t notice before, and being attracted to groups or activities aligned with your goals. At the same time, you might be less attracted to activities that take you off course or cause you to procrastinate. All of these changes would move you toward achieving your goal.
But there’s a catch, and it’s a big one. You won’t develop empowering beliefs like these just by deciding you want to.
Conscious decision about what you want to believe isn’t enough. For a belief to really serve you, it has to be something that rings true for you on every level, conscious and unconscious, down to the bone.
Unfortunately, the human mind is amazingly capable of confusing itself and sabotaging its own highest good. Thoughts and ideas embedded in our subconscious minds, often from earliest childhood, can interfere with our conscious wishes. If we try to paste a happy face over a deep–down feeling of fear or helplessness, this could create a whole new inner conflict and actually make matters worse.
Tim Hallbom explains:
“Suppose when you were a small child you heard your parents talking, saying things like ‘Rich people don’t go to heaven,’ or they scolded you for bad behavior and told you you didn’t deserve to be rewarded. That belief is embedded in your sense of yourself, and you’re not going to get rid of it by ignoring it.
“Self-worth is a very common issue in beliefs about money,” Tim continues. “Another common belief is that rich people aren’t nice, so if you become rich, you’ll turn into someone you don’t really want to be. For some people, it’s an issue of family betrayal: if my parents and my grandparents were poor, by getting rich I’d be rejecting my own family.”
Beliefs like these lurk deep in our minds, where we tend not not to bring them to light. As long as they are not spoken out loud, not articulated consciously, they cannot be confronted or changed.
It’s easy to see how a limiting belief, gnawing away at an unconscious level, can interfere with an individual’s ability to take on a challenge like developing wealth.
The Hallboms’ work on beliefs incorporates techniques that address this concern. Through extensive research, training and testing, in collaboration with other major leaders in the field of NLP, they have developed techniques to overcome these limitations.
“What we call the Belief Change Process is a series of steps,” Kris Hallbom says. “First, we uncover the limiting belief so that it is stated explicitly. Next, we dismantle the belief so that it is nearly impossible to reconstruct. Finally, we replace it with a new, empowering belief. The new belief will be one generated by the person himself or herself, so that it fits fully and naturally with that person’s world view and values.”
In many cases the the steps can be accomplished in a single session. The session takes the form of a highly structured interview. The practitioner or guide uses a number of linguistic techniques to lead the person through the steps. These techniques are taught in Wealthy Mind™ seminars by the Hallboms all over the world.
What is meant by “dismantling” a belief? In general terms, it means adding new information or evidence, so that it is not possible to continue to have the old belief. As an example, consider a person who believes that the only way to stay loyal to his family heritage of poverty and struggle is to stay poor and struggling. When the hidden belief is uncovered, it’s possible to notice that all those struggling family members sacrificed as they did because they wanted to give the gift of a more comfortable life to their children and grandchildren. It’s possible to say that getting rich does not dishonor their memory but fulfills their mission; in fact, staying poor would be the dishonorable thing. It’s also possible to say that family heritage refers to the future as well as the past, and ask the participant what he wants for his children and grandchildren. Which idea works will always depend on the specific individual—but you can imagine how some individuals might respond to those ideas by changing their beliefs about wealth immediately. The new insights can make it literally impossible ever to go back to the old belief.
What about empowering beliefs? What are the characteristics of such a belief? To answer this question, the Hallboms have drawn on the rich base of wisdom that underlies the field of NLP. Having studied the structure of beliefs that lead to successful outcomes in life, they have learned that certain key elements must be present to drive behavior toward a desired direction.
Three elements must be present—stated or implied—in a well–formed belief about wealth or success.
Those elements are:
1. It’s possible.
2. I’m capable.
3. I’m worth it.
“It’s possible:” In an empowering belief, it’s assumed that, within the world, it is possible to accomplish your goal. Can somebody do what you want to do? Has anybody ever done it? If you doubt this, you might want to search for evidence among people you know or read biographies of people who have accomplished this goal.
“I’m capable.” An empowering belief suggests that you have capabilities and can use them. At the beginning of a new venture you might not know what you will be required to do. You might not know whether you will be able to do it all. A well-formed belief may contain the idea that if you can’t do something today, you can learn to do it tomorrow, or get help doing it, or find another way to get it done. Such a belief will help you to face the challenge with confidence.
“I’m worth it.” Do you believe you are? If you have doubts about your self-worth, the Belief Change process can help to clear them up and let you find within yourself a new level of affirmation of your value to yourself and others.
In addition to containing these three elements, an empowering belief must be one that looks, sounds and feels right to YOU and you alone. It must be stated in vocabulary that fits for YOU. It must be aligned with your other beliefs and values and with the outcome you desire. This is especially important in matters related to money, since it’s so common to have conflicts or sensitivities. The belief must also provide you with a sense of motivation. As you work through the WealthyMind ™ process to develop this belief, only you can judge whether the statement you are constructing is exactly right or whether it needs more refinement. The guide’s job is to lead and assist you.
“At the end of this process,” Kris says, “you will find a stronger connection to the goals that are already in your heart, and a new vigor and enthusiasm for achieving them. That’s what we want for you. Our own goal is to use our skills and our knowledge of NLP to liberate human potential. Prosperity is part of that liberation.”
“Today people are eager to live more authentic, empowered lives,” Tim says. “We are no longer willing to accept unfulfilled relationships, unhealthy bodies or joyless experiences. Instead, we desire lives of the highest level of satisfaction. To that end, our mission is to help undo the influences of old beliefs and habits by creating new ones that lead to joy, prosperity and health.”